I have been thinking about it for a while. It was the culmination of me reading Identity Crisis and the realization that most comic book moms are dead. So I have compiled a list of ten characters that have suffered through some of the worst tragedies imaginable. Now, it can get to be pretty crude at parts, so if you dislike darker subject material, then you may want to avoid this post.
Alan Scott: On the surface you see one of the most disciplined and respectable heroes, using his years of experience to guide and teach others. However it is his age that is his curse. Like soldiers, the original JSA became very close. They became a family. Alan gains his power from the Starheart, which also keeps him young. His friends were not that lucky. The ones that didn’t die fighting along side of him succumb to old age eventually, while he never did. In addition to this, he witnessed the murder of his wife, which he was powerless to stop, and watched his daughter die protecting him (more on her later). Yes, Alan has buried more friends and loved ones than any other character in the DCU. Immortality is a bitch.
Ralph Dibney. Ralph Dibney only lived for one thing. His wife. He was madly in love with her, and her with him. They became the most succesful married couple in comics, and showed that a marriage between a super hero and a normal citizen could work, and they did all of this without using secret identities. This however, turned out to be Ralph’s undoing. His pregnant wife raped and murdered, without her light in his life, Ralph had no reason to live. He loved his wife so much that when she died, he had nothing left to care about. After deciding to commit suicide, Ralph wasn’t even allowed to do that. No, instaed angsty teenagers defaced his wifes grave. Pissed he went to find them, and wound up in a magical conspiracy centered around Satan. Satan then taunted Ralph with images of what his life would have been life had Sue not died. Ralph attempted to trap Satan, but was unable too, and died in the process. And who says you don’t need alter ego’s to keep your family safe? And this is why the ENTIRE MARVEL UNIVERSE IS FLAWED.
Ray Palmer. The compassionate friend to all, the compassionate friend who’s ex-wife became a murderous psychopath, inflicting horrible pain upon his closest friends. He saw his friend Sue Dibney murdered, Ralph die, protected a new race of sentient beings only to see their entire civilization wiped out, and on the eve of the anniversary of his divorce (to the same murderous ex-wife mentioned above), his two remaining friends, Hawkman and Hawkgirl are murdered. By the reanimated corpses of his other dead friends. Ray is a sincere and kind man, who even after experiencing all of these hardships, still manages to be the most compassionate man in the universe. Seriously. Most normal people would have called it quits by now. I mean seriously? He is still in love with his ex wife? Even after she murdered three of his best friends? I think that goes beyond compassion into the realm of stalker.
Barry Allen. When he was just a boy, nothing went his way. His mother however, always kept him positive. His mother is murdered, and his innocent father framed. Barry managed to preserve and become one of the worlds greatest heroes. He then sacrifices himself to save the world, he comes back (25 years later) his wife and his friends have aged, while he had not. He then realizes that his life force is parasitic and kills one of his former enemies. Parents dead, check, alienated from friends, check, accidentally kills someone, check. Oh, did I mention that one super villain is responsible for his crappy life? Because Barry is the Flash, a maniac from the future copies his powers and travels through time. Since he can’t kill Barry, he just makes his life miserable. Forever. Yes, Barry is forever stuck in a temporal cycle of misery. He should just have stayed dead.
Booster Gold. A victim of his own arrogance, the star athlete ruined his life chances and career. Time traveling to the past to make a name for himself, which doesn’t go according to plan. He meets Ted Kord who turns his life around and makes Booster into a new man. It is revealed that Booster’s sister followed him to the past, where she also makes a life and falls in love with another hero. Booster found a new family. Ted is murdered trying to save the world (nobody cares), Booster’s sister and husband are murdered, and because of his past, he is alienated from the other heroes in the DCU. Yes. Booster fled the future to find peace in the past. Which was also promptly destroyed. Just goes to show you, karma will find you. In any time period.
Kyle Rayner. Considered to be one of the greatest Lanterns of all time, there is a very basic formula about Kyle. Kyle meets girl.. Kyle and girl fall in love. Girl is dismembered and put in his refrigerator (seriously). Rinse and repeat. In his young life Kyle has lost not one, not two, no. 3 girlfriends in some of the most gruesome ways possible. The dudes like 26. That’s way more than most any 26-year-old now a days could take today. Kyle is currently in a stable and happy relationship with another Green Lantern. Unfortunately she’s not smart enough to realize her life expectancy just dropped exponentially.
James Gordon. One of the most righteous forces of good in the DCU, and he has no powers. After being framed for a crime he didn’t commit, he was exiled from the Metropolis PD, moving instead to Gotham (WHY GOTHAM?!?!?!?). Struggling to protect himself and his family from the corrupt police department at first, James finally settled in. His wife then abandons him and his two young children. Eventually he marries again. She is promptly murdered by the Joker. It is then revealed that his son, James Jr is a sociopath that stalks, rapes and murders women. After arresting him he is able to settle down, and begin providing for his daughter. Who is then shot, paralyzed, tortured, and raped by the Joker. Despite all of this James is still the constant foil to Batman. Preventing him from going over the edge, while he himself should have already fallen. Someone should give this man a medal. Or several medals. However, let’s refrain from giving him the “best father” or “best husband” medal. He might not take it so well.
Aquaman. Scorned on the surface, scorned by the people he once ruled. And pursued by an autistic black guy that hates water. This is the life of Arthur Curry. He is the rightful heir to Atlantis, and rules them for a time, however he adventures on the surface with the Justice League. People ridiculed him while his subjects became rebellious. His brother betrayed him, his wife was secretly sent to kill him, his infant son was murdered (by the autistic black guy), one of his wards (Aquagirl) was murdered, he lost a hand, got a magic one, lost it, was exiled from his kingdom, returned to save the people who hated him (they still hated him). This event left him deformed and hideous. And he’s killed by his own people, afraid of “the monster”. He is resurrected as a zombie, kills his other ward (Aqualad/Tempest). Is revived, and loses his hand. Yes. This is all true. And this was his life. Why does he keep being a hero? EVERYONE HATES HIM. Especially the autistic black guy.
Batman. Come on, you knew he’d be on the list. Parents are murdered, best friend (Harvey Dent) becomes a murderous villain (because he couldn’t save him), Meets and falls in love with Bat-Woman (erased from existence), Robin grows up to be a dick (like his name), second Robin murdered by the Joker (whom he also created), unable to save third Robin’s father from a fat dude with a boomerang, 4th Robin is murdered by mobsters, Batgirl is shot, paralyzed, tortured and raped, by the Joker. Umm what else, Joker murders children, check. Joker kills other best friends wife, check. Batman’s best friend from childhood turns out to hate him and murders some more of his friends. The list goes on, and on, and on, and on, and on. Batman has perhaps the crappiest life in comics. So brilliant he rarely makes a mistake, but when he does, it has drastic consequences.
Alfred Pennyworth. Shares a love for Bruce that only a father could know. Trying his hardest to make his adopted son’s life easier. Every loss Bruce sufferes, is doubly felt by Alfred, yet Alfred isn’t allowed to break down. He always has to be strong for Bruce. Seriously. Think about everything that Alfred has done for Bruce, really think about it. How Alfred is forced to watch is adopted son kill himself. Watching him slowly go mad. Watching him suffer. All the while there’s nothing he can do. He can sow a wound yes, but he can’t heal a heart. And that’s what hurts Bruce the most. And Alfred too. Brings a whole new meaning to “family”.
Well, there you have it. Hear are some of the worst cases in comic books. Despite all of this, all characters (minus Ralph) managed to remain positive and fight on as heroes, unwilling to succumb to the darnkess that has seemingly consumed their lives.
Until the next time, live long and prosper.
Rn
Ravingnerd 